Question: I have herpes and I got it when I was 16 years old when I was sexually promiscuous and have turned my life around now. I am not living with self-hate. I am walking through a process of healing. I turned my life around at 21 years old.
But I realize I am not delivered from blaming myself for my past and have entered a dysfunctional marriage and settled for less than God’s best over the years. I went to ORU and received my Masters, but I personally struggle with herpes and I know God has a greater plan for me. I, one day, want to write a book for Christians struggling in this area, when I am delivered from the shame that is trying to grip me.
Answer: Paul says, “Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13,14
If anyone had some things to be blaming himself, for what he had done in the past, it was Paul. He had, no doubt, made many Christians suffer; we know he was at the stoning of Stephen, the first martyr. Luke also comments about Saul, later called Paul, “As for Saul, he made havoc of the church, entering every house, and dragging off men and women, committing them to prison.” (Acts 8:3)
Paul in reviewing his life before he was saved prays, “So I said, Lord, they know that in every synagogue I imprisoned and beat those who believe on You. 20 And when the blood of Your martyr Stephen was shed, I also was standing by consenting to his death, and guarding the clothes of those who were killing him.” (Acts 22:19,20)
Paul makes this bold statement, “This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief. However, for this reason I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might show all longsuffering, as a pattern to those who are going to believe on Him for everlasting life.” (1 Timothy1:15, 16)
God has forgiven us, and we need to look at Paul as an example of how to live after we are saved. Now, also, look at how God used him after he was saved. God wants to do the same with you! So forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, we are to press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
As far as the herpes is concerned, here is a question and answer on this topic that might help you.
We are praying for you that God will do just that for you and everyone else in your position. I believe God has great things in mind for you!
I hope this helps,
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